Writing a profile for online dating

‘People have to imagine how they’ll fit into your life, so describing yourself as a “bookworm and internet addict” makes them feel they’d never see you,’ explains match.com’s relationship expert Kate Taylor.

‘Play up your love of anything sporty, outdoorsy or public – like concerts and exhibitions.’ Wouldn’t you know, profile photos that demonstrate you playing your guitar or downhill skiing – even if your face isn’t showing – get more messages.

Here are the top things I learned when working with people on theirs—that will work for you, too. But the e-Cyrano method would have you choose the best, most concise example of one time you were funny with an ex and put it into present tense: “When you have a bad day, I’ll dress like Homer (your favorite Simpsons character) and do impressions of him until you feel better.” 3) Write 200 words or less.

One engaging paragraph is far better than endless run-on sentences.

The end result would be a profile that read like a good article or book jacket instead of a dating ad, and when someone reached the end of it, they’d want to read more and contact the person.

As e-Cyrano’s founder, Evan Marc Katz, likes to say, “It’s simply our job to capture you, like a cameraman taking a photo.” So, why not revamp online dating profile? Then, figure out and write down what’s 2) Like with any writing, “show don’t tell,” and the more specific, the better. Evan is a big believer in “redefining the adjective.” Meaning, if you think you’re “funny” and state that you’re killing it in your stand-up comedy class, you write the funniest messages in birthday cards and you make everyone at work laugh, that’s OK.

These guys and their data teams ran queries of all kinds and pulled spreadsheet after spreadsheet of information to try and answer our strange questions.

We also needed Ok Cupid to get permission from their users to enable us to publish those popular profile pics.

bathroom-blowjob

bathroom-blowjob

Maybe you’ve decided to finally give online dating a try, or maybe you’re just wondering why your matches aren’t responding to your profile. Don’t whine about your singleness status, about the bad first dates you’ve had lately or about the sad state of politics in your area.You’ll come across as condescending and judgmental. Don’t pretend to have a better job than you do, or that you’re more prepared for long-term commitment than you currently are. Be concise, clear, and watch out for typos and grammatical errors. Related to #6: Don’t be too vague or use too many clichéd phrases. Be careful to screen your photos, too: Don’t upload a pic of yourself in front of your new home, for example. Don’t list the qualities you believe you “deserve.” Instead, focus on what you have to offer. If you can’t put the time into filling out a simple dating profile, why would an interested guy/gal assume you’d put the time investing into getting to know them? My friends could better answer this for you.” Good luck!Don’t bite the hand that might be feeding you your soulmate. You don’t need to share all your dirty little secrets in your profile, but you shouldn’t use deception to lure dates either. Never list what you’re looking for money-wise or baby-wise in a relationship. Everyone likes “having fun” and would list their musical tastes as “eclectic.” You’re certainly not the only person who “can’t live without oxygen, friends, and family.” Fill your profile with details that reflect you as an individual. Related: Don’t provide a list of dating rules or expectations — unless you don’t want anyone to contact you. There are a few profile-writing strategies to optimize the likelihood of interest from potential matches. Keep in mind the rules of first-date conversation and apply them to how you introduce yourself to strangers online, too. Keep your profile upbeat and focused on all the great things you have to offer and are looking for in a new relationship.

Here are ten things to never write in an online profile: 1. Insulting the method — or the people using the method — of finding love that you’re currently giving a try is a huge turn-off. Don’t lie about your height, age or weight: you’ll be found out soon enough. (Hint: No one’s profile says “seeking bitter pessimist.”) 6. If your profile is ten times longer than everyone else’s, it won’t be given much attention. They shouldn’t be able to identify your specific place of work, home address, last name or personal contact information from your profile. Don’t demand that your future partner love, worship, and adore you. Users skim profiles looking for a reason to send a message or dismiss (hint: do not mention your mom or exes).

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74 Comments

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  2. eric   •  

    What do I do when I am assigned a social security number (SSN)?

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